I stood on the shoulders of giants

In My Words

"Don't ever lose faith in who you are, for that's what makes you different.
Don't try to turn yourself into someone everyone else is, for if that happens, the world is a poorer place."
- Sept 2005

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kelvin
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It has been some time since I last blogged and I am feeling the lethargy that ruled me last year where my blog went for weeks without a new entry. Feeling sorry that my new year resolutions never seem to last more than a couple of weeks I decide to plonk myself down on my chair and start doing some serious blogging.

Finally there is some closure and I am relieved and appreciative of that. Forgive me for being cryptic but it is sufficient to say that I am happy . Now that is a word you do not hear very often from me but yeah, i'm saying it now.

Nicola's coming back from Budapest tomorrow, with hopefully a whole load of pictures to share about how eastern europe looks like. It does feel funny not to have nicola to talk to or to yak non-stop with for nearly 2 weeks but it's alright, she'll be back tomorrow. For all her complaints and idiosyncransies, she is a wonderful tudi to have and i'm appreciative of it.

I was walking out of Chinatown a couple of days ago and was walking along charing cross road when i found myself walking into an accident scene. as i was pushing my way though the crowd i stole quick glances at the proceedings and saw enough to see 2 cars being pushed to one side of the single carriageway charing cross road and the 2 drivers hurling obscenities at each other. then as they took their own sweet time arguing, a long queue of cars started to form behind them. those 2 blokes (guys unfortunately), oblivious to the need of the cars behind them to pass continued arguing at their own leisure and didn't really think about moving onto a side lane where they can further develop their own theories about whose fault it was. Considerate people.

On another note, it is interesting to note that it seems like a natural tendency that when somethign goes wrong, you'll just say "IT'S NOT MY FAULT". everyone seems to do it. the other day i was at this gift shop at Baker street, one of 2 little girls brushed against a clay thingy and it dropped! and 2 of them immediately started pointing at each other and saying "YOU DID IT!!" well, obviously one of them did it so yah.

It is natural when something goes wrong to defend oneself first. i think so. but defending oneself at the expense of another? now that is something very different and very selfish.

Joce wrote something on her blog i quite didn't agree with. not that i don't agree per se, but probably in a deeper sense. here's a conversation i had with another friend.

3/31/2005
K: my friend once wrote something on self love being the greatest love of all. do you think you'll agree with this statement? as in love for one self being superior over love for others

P: oh yeah, i agree. i believe that people are intrinsically selfish. wat do ya think?

K: ppl are. but what is the extent and that is the crux of my argument. i think one can never call affections for another person love until one is willing to put that person above his/her own self

K: i think love is the greatest power of all and the day where you place someone/something above yourself is the day you love someone else

P: i don't think that self-sacrificial love exists

K: then it's not love, it's called lust, attraction, affection blah blah to me. true love is when the subject of that affection becomes greater than love for yourself, and it does exist for one i believe in it

K:let's say love for money where people will work torturous hours for pay, where people sell their bodies for money, or a love for one's child when a mum runs into a burning building to save one's child

P:that's putting it in different context

K: but it is still love. love is when something matters so much to you that it is more important than yourself . there are other words to describe the other feelings

P: wat about relationships?

K:i don't call a flower vase relationship a loving one, i don't call holding hands love, affection maybe. i don't call kissing love passion maybe. i don't call making love LOVE. it's ridiculous, it's just lust. there are so many different levels of emotional attachment. but ppl seem to just put it all under an umbrella called love

K: love is a great thing, ppl just reduce it to a common thing over time. for something to have a god named after it i.e. Aphrodite, i think it's been sorta tainted by people over time that the true essence has been lost. ppl nowadays just say I love you without knowing or appreciating what it means nobody puts much thought into it anyway.

Vehemently disagree?

kelvin was inspired at 11:59 PM