"Don't ever lose faith in who you are, for that's what makes you different.
Don't try to turn yourself into someone everyone else is, for if that happens, the world is a poorer place."
- Sept 2005
It's not been an easy few days. In fact it's been a disturbing few days, which has hardly made it easier for me to get by. But thank God for the few moments of sunshine which have helped balance it out a little.
Had dinner with "Take DB Down" on sunday, a nice respite from individual meals i've been having. Also had 2 meals in 2 days with "I-Love-Love-Letters" and "GD", and they were good too. Just for the fact that we haven't really talked all that much and so there were lots of things to say, to find out and to just ramble on aimlessly with. Also a lunch with "mummy long legs" during which we relived some good times, some bad times and start thinking where and what went wrong.
But welcome as they are, they are but brief respites from days which stretch from morning till night, chock full of books, administration and artwork. I think i'm bad at delegating. I try to but sometimes I wonder if it's just me giving sub-standard instructions or something else, but I end up taking much much longer to get it down that way. Given that i'm such a stickler for efficiency and quality, isn't it much easier if i do everything myself?
Sometimes I hate depending on other people too. I always pride myself on being an independent free spirit, self sufficient and I'm not used to asking people for help. Call it overwhelming pride but i've always gotten things done, and whatever i've achieved thus far, especially in the UK much of which I have done myself. Proud of it perhaps, but the side result : I live in a world where there can quite possibly be only myself.